OK, so I wasn't really questioned, but an NSA cop did make me run through the pictures on my digital camera for him.
My sister Emily, her boyfriend Jon, Mark and I went to the NSA's National Cryptologic Museum today near Laurel, Md.
Afterwards we stopped at National Vigilance Park -- a bit of greenspace off the highway where they parked three big planes. Apparently, all the buildings behind the park are NSA and picture taking is a no-no. We're farting around at the park and an NSA cop rolls up in an SUV cruiser and rolls down the passenger side window.
"How're you doin?"
"Fine. That a digital camera?"
"Yeah."
"Come over to this side of the car please."
I walk over.
"Let me see your pictures."
"Ok..."
I start scrolling through and he sees one he'd like a closer peek at, touches my camera and turns off the preview function.
"What happened?"
"You pressed a button. Hang on."
"OK."
He looks at all the pictures. Nothing scandalous, except maybe this picture of me nearly getting sucked into the jet intake of a EA-3B Navy Recon jet.
(Click pic for photo album)
"Anybody else got a camera?"
"Yeah," Mark says.
"Let me see it."
He scrolls through the pictures, same as before.
"Can I take your picture?" I query.
"No."
"What?"
"No."
"Oh, OK."
"Anybody else have a camera?"
"I have one in the car," Emily says.
"That's OK," he says as he finishes flipping through Mark's pictures.
"How long are you all going to be here?"
No one answers. Cop mumbles something about taking pictures of the buildings behind us.
"Can I take pictures that way?" I ask, gesturing at the buildings.
"No."
"Oh."
But I'm getting ahead of myself. Back to the Crypto Museum.
We arrived shortly after 10 a.m. and wandered around for a few minutes before a dude announced he'd give us and the other ramblers a tour of the joint.
It was a pretty good tour, I guess. He covered the bits about the Enigma machine purdy well, but closer to present day started weaving in tales about being vigilant of terrorists and and started explaining history by anecdote and it was a little hard to follow. We wandered off after a while and poked our heads back in every now and again.
Enigma!
Then we headed over to the National Vigilance Park, next to the NSA. Let me ask you a question: Why the hell would you park a park next the NSA? Do the NSA cops harass every tourist who stops to look at the planes, or did we just look scary?
Done with the NSA, we hop back in the highway and drive to Baltimore. It's aquarium time!
We get our tickets all sorted out and grab a quick bite to eat before the 4D immersion movie begins.
It was basically a 15-minute edited-down version of a Planet Earth episode with David Attenborough which employed 3-D glasses, squirts of water, vibrating seats, burst of air and bubbles (like the kind you blew with a little wand when you were a kid). It was cool, but definitely aimed at the wee ones.
The aquarium was really cool. We saw lots of neato aminals. Like these guys:
And this guy:
Gimmie a kiss! I'm an electric EEEEEEEEL!
Don't forget these fellas!
The rest of the animals can be found in the photo album.
We were quite thirsty after the rainforest and Australian desert exhibits, so we wandered down to the airport-like strip mall off the water and grabbed a bite to eat and a drink. Which is when we found the King of the Jungle, aka XXX, aka Vin Diesel, aka bad-dresser man, wandering around aimlessly from floor to floor.
Finally a janitor asked him something and he bought some chicken.
"Dude, have you seen my bro?"
"Yeah," Mark says.
"Let me see it."
He scrolls through the pictures, same as before.
"Can I take your picture?" I query.
"No."
"What?"
"No."
"Oh, OK."
"Anybody else have a camera?"
"I have one in the car," Emily says.
"That's OK," he says as he finishes flipping through Mark's pictures.
"How long are you all going to be here?"
No one answers. Cop mumbles something about taking pictures of the buildings behind us.
"Can I take pictures that way?" I ask, gesturing at the buildings.
"No."
"Oh."
But I'm getting ahead of myself. Back to the Crypto Museum.
We arrived shortly after 10 a.m. and wandered around for a few minutes before a dude announced he'd give us and the other ramblers a tour of the joint.
It was a pretty good tour, I guess. He covered the bits about the Enigma machine purdy well, but closer to present day started weaving in tales about being vigilant of terrorists and and started explaining history by anecdote and it was a little hard to follow. We wandered off after a while and poked our heads back in every now and again.
Enigma!
Just a couple jolly gentlemen.
Emily shows us how to use some big-ass crypto machine.
Maps are cool.
Maps are cool.
Mark starts playing war games.
Then we headed over to the National Vigilance Park, next to the NSA. Let me ask you a question: Why the hell would you park a park next the NSA? Do the NSA cops harass every tourist who stops to look at the planes, or did we just look scary?
Maybe it was our four matching pea coats.
Done with the NSA, we hop back in the highway and drive to Baltimore. It's aquarium time!
We get our tickets all sorted out and grab a quick bite to eat before the 4D immersion movie begins.
It was basically a 15-minute edited-down version of a Planet Earth episode with David Attenborough which employed 3-D glasses, squirts of water, vibrating seats, burst of air and bubbles (like the kind you blew with a little wand when you were a kid). It was cool, but definitely aimed at the wee ones.
The aquarium was really cool. We saw lots of neato aminals. Like these guys:
We like swimming, but we also like sitting down to rest our weary flippers.
And this guy:
Look at me! I'm a Waxy Monkey Frog!
And this guy!Gimmie a kiss! I'm an electric EEEEEEEEL!
Don't forget these fellas!
Pssh! We scoff at you! We poison dart frogs are too cool to face you. Neener neener.
You'd better put down that spear gun, mister, or we'll tell!
The rest of the animals can be found in the photo album.
We were quite thirsty after the rainforest and Australian desert exhibits, so we wandered down to the airport-like strip mall off the water and grabbed a bite to eat and a drink. Which is when we found the King of the Jungle, aka XXX, aka Vin Diesel, aka bad-dresser man, wandering around aimlessly from floor to floor.
Finally a janitor asked him something and he bought some chicken.
"Dude, have you seen my bro?"
Let's get another look at your lovely coat.
"Normally, both your asses would be dead as fucking fried chicken, but you happen to pull this shit while I'm in a transitional period so I don't wanna kill you, I wanna help you. But I can't give you this case, it don't belong to me. Besides, I've already been through too much shit this morning over this case to hand it over to your dumb ass."
And with that the great adventure was over. Stay tuned for more episodes of Tan Doug Tours St. Croix!
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